What a week it's been already!! I'm tired and I should really be in bed. I guess it takes a little while to unwind from the day of kids and keeping the house and family. Some of you don't know yet but I quit my job last week and I am officially a stay at home mom. Crazy!! It was a quick decision and it happened quickly too. It was definitely in God's hands and still is. He provided me with two children to care for in our home to supplement our income above and beyond what we were in need of. What a blessing to wake up in the morning and know that I don't have to take the girls to someone else's house and drop them off. I get to spend the day with them. It feels wonderful to know that......but, exhausting!! :)
That thought of being with them so much really got me thinking tonight. I was looking at some pictures of Avery Lynn and just soaking in how beautifully sweet she is. What a wonderful feeling to know that she is my little girl and I can pick her up and kiss her and love on her any time that I want to. I've found that it's such a true "lovely ache" to be a parent. By that I mean, the love we have for our children is so deep yet it's a tiny ache because we can't protect them from everything. We look at them with such a love that you just want to reach inside and hold their heart and protect it from the evil in the world, but we just can't. We can only pray that each and everything we do, to and for them is reaching inside and touching them in a powerful, positive way. At the end of the day, they have their own will and their own choices that they get to make and it is not in our hands as parents. How God must feel the same way about us.....but stronger. After all, we're HIS children. I can't imagine the pain he must feel when our hearts are not receptive to him. After the love and grace that he shows us continually and everlasting, yet we still assert our own wills more often than not and some people never even receive him at all.
With all of that being said...I wonder, did God make it this way to show us just a tiny glimpse of how very much he loves us? Was it a way for him to show us the ache that he feels inside by allowing us to make our own choices, knowing that we may not choose to follow him? In the end, it's such a beautiful thing. He has given us this awesome opportunity and responsibility to love, nurture, teach and disciple our children to find their way to eternity with Him. If only everyone saw it this way. Our children not only make up the future here on earth.....they should be what our lives are about. We're here to live as Christ's examples and honor, serve and follow the direction God has given us. Shouldn't our job as parents be seen as part of our purpose on earth? He gave them to us to bring back to him. What a task!!! It's a love and it's an ache!!
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